DC police have a solution to the relentless crime plaguing the city: Apple AirTags 🤡
· Dec 5, 2023 · NottheBee.com

So good to know that when you really need them, police in our nation's capital will be there to tell you to protect your life and your property with consumer electronics:

Police in Washington, DC have urged anyone wearing a Canada Goose jacket to slip an Apple AirTag into their pocket amid an increase in thefts of the luxury garments.

Via the coin-sized device, victims would be able to track their jackets in the event that they are stolen.

"I've seen people use them on tool kits, suitcases," Commander Sylvan Altieri told Fox5 DC. "I think that's probably the best thing you can do as far as if it gets taken, because it's a nice way to track it."

Police in Washington as your expensive purchased goods are getting robbed from you at gunpoint:

You, attempting to track your stolen jacket by jackleg radar:

Seems like there might be a better way to do this! Like, I dunno, increasing a proactive police presence in the city, targeting illegal goods rings, arresting repeat offenders and not letting them out of jail. All good ideas.

(Allowing citizens to protect their belongings with a blaster like good ol' Thomas Jefferson intended might also be a novel idea!)

Note that the situation is escalating over there. These are not just simple boosts or thefts:

Police said three suspects hopped out of a car, pointed guns, and demanded a victim's Canada Goose jacket just a few blocks from Dupont Circle on Tuesday night.

One resident correctly noted that the whole thing is "a really scary situation, especially over just a jacket."

If I lived in DC, I might put my Canada Goose jacket away this winter. Just sayin'.


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