For today's real news that should be satire, I give you CBS News promising to put you, the viewer, first -- over advertisers, politicians, and corporate interests.
People do not trust us like they used to.
And now, apparently, CBS News is going to be the outlet that doesn't miss the story because they've got Bari Weiss now and everything has changed or something.
Back to Tony:
I love talking to people about what works in this country, what doesn't -- and not only what should change, but the good ideas that should never change. I think telling the truth is one of them.
"Hold me to it," he says.
Okay, Tony, I know you mean you specifically, but uhh...
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